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Random Movie: Bloodlust Zombies (2011)

Written by: PBF

In yet another porn to mainstream transition, adult film star Alexis Texas stars in Bloodlust Zombies. This film is sort of a piss poor combination of Office Space and Zombieland. And porno. It arrives on DVD on July 5th.

So there is this office building. In the building there is a lab where some kind of chemical is being developed and tested. At the beginning of the film, all we know about it is that it seems to make house cats insane. The boss and Andrea (Texas) are having sex when they accidentally tun the office intercom system on. The entire building can hear the fornication and react by laughing and/or mimicking sexual positions. Why, even the serious minded lab workers join in the fun and accidentally cause a spill. Someone gets bitten by an insane house cat test subject and BAM! There’s your outbreak. So, to be more factual, these would be blood lust infected, not zombies. It is later explained that the chemical was actually designed to be used in wars as a biochemical weapon. The intent was to administer it to our enemies, and they would become infected and kill each other. As a result of the spill, the building immediately goes on lock down; electronic door locks do not work, main power goes out. This goes on for a 25 minute period. During this 25 minutes, the nerdy scientist office workers turn into some kind of zombie dispatching commando unit, hurling bullets and bad jokes all over the place.

Now, you may be saying to yourself, “Hey. I like Office Space. I like Zombieland. I like porno. Surely the melding of these concepts would go together like a delicious sub sandwich that was just invented in a test kitchen.” Fucking incorrect.

There just isn’t much in this film that is very good. Not even the nudity is enough to make anyone care. The acting is excruciating. The comedy is not funny. The effects are weak at best. I didn’t care about one person in this thing, so it didn’t matter who lived or died. There is a security guard who is apparently related to Dante Hicks as he keeps repeating how he isn’t supposed to be there today. Even the music gets tired and annoying. There is a hand print on my forehead as I pretty much spent the entire film watching it with my head in my hand.

The one (and I mean one) thing that I liked was the idea of the zombie (infected) apocalypse being confined to one place where no one could escape. But all the boring bad comedians I had to deal with completely ruined that.

As you well know, we here at Movie Scum embrace the indie movie. There are some great pictures that were made on the flimsiest of budgets. You should run from this film. Run like it’s the infected.

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