Movie Scum

Not willing to let a 22-year-old sleeping dog lie, Warner Brothers is kicking up the old pooch for another installment of 1993’s The Fugitive . No word yet on any returning players including the incredible old duo of Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones according to Deadline . Considering the original Fugitive started as a TV series back in the 60s, was turned into a film of the same title in ‘93, was followed by the forgettable U.S. Marshalls sequel in 1998, and then repurposed again into a TV show in the early 2000s, I suspect we’ll see another half-dozen sequels and TV adaptations before we all succumb to death by the one-armed man.

Mad Max: Fury Road : Opening May 15 The Good : Tom Hardy. Charlize Theron. Original director George Miller. Lots of car chases and explosions. The trailers look absolutely insane filled with completely over-the-top violence and grungy people. The Bad : This is a reported straight sequel to the series started in 1979 and typically, franchises with long gaps in between films tend to not be too well regarded. Given that Mad Mel Gibson is way too old and way too crazy to reprise his role, it may or may not be a good thing that Hardy is taking over. But then again, Ol’ Mel spouting anti-semantic rants while chasing makeshift dune buggies could be an interesting watch. The Prognostication : It’ll be crazy and action-packed. But other than the completely insane trailers and TV spots that have been released, would there really be much of an interest for a thirty-year-old series? We’ll see but I don’t expect it to trump Avengers in it’s third weekend.

Back before the rise of hundreds of cable channels catering to every niche, no matter how small or stupid, and instant video options that put dozens (DOZENS!) of top movies only a click away, it seemed that we all were, more or less, on the same page for our entertainment input. Between the top TV shows which averaged more viewers than a few networks combined get now to the big box office films that were showed edited and punctuated with commercials, the world was a much simpler place. This weekend, as I read an article from The AV Club which kindly name dropped #pbf’s favorite film, Weekend at Bernie’s , along with its wretched sequel, I began to wonder how pervasive were films twenty years ago compared to now. It feels like everyone over the age of 25 has seen Weekend at Bernie’s or Die Hard simply because they were played ad nauseum on HBO or NBC. But it doesn’t seem as easy for a film to have that penetration anymore with so many different entertainment venues. I even beg

Iron Man 2 (2010) Even with the addition of Sam Rockwell and the introduction of Black Widow, Iron Man 2 feels less like a complete film and more of just a teaser that just happens to star Robert Downey, Jr. Thor: The Dark World (2013) I swear I saw this film and for the life of me cannot remember anything plot-wise about it. I do know Idris Elba gets more to do and Rene Russo gets ... well less. Another filler movie in the MCU. Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) Granted, without the First Avenger, Captain America’s arc from a bullied kid from Brooklyn to the figurehead of the most powerful country of the world and his sacrifice means nothing. But this was still an odd movie, both in scope, in cannon with the rest of the films, and in the wonky plot structure. The Incredible Hulk (2008) Even though Edward Norton was recast for The Avengers, his Bruce Banner carried a low-lying intensity with a human touch that comes in handy when the Green Giant with purple sho

Many have proclaimed this period to be the “golden age of television,” and with high-caliber, expertly done shows like The Good Wife , Game of Thrones , and Big Bang Theory , they may be right. But what does this upcoming season’s crop of new series show? Rather than recycling ideas for movies, they are now being recycled for TV. Case in point, by my count (and granted I might have missed a few), there are no fewer than four (4!) old movie properties re-purposed for weekly consumption by the masses. Let’s take a look at CBS’s upcoming show based on when Chris Tucker had a viable career. Rush Hour - “A stoic, by-the-book Hong Kong police officer is assigned to a case in Los Angeles where he’s forced to work with a cocky African-American LAPD officer who has no interest in a partner.” Stars Justin Hires, Jon Foo,Aimee Garcia and Wendie Malick. Sign me up for more fish-out-of-water shenanigans with a clueless foreign detective and a loud-mouth know-it-all. I give it a 13 episod

If my contention is correct in that the original Horrible Bosses will stand the comedic test of time much like Office Space or the original Vacation, Horrible Bosses 2 will fall to the wayside as a film that tries too hard to recreate the original with a lot more stuff that falls flat. Our heroic trio of Nick, Kurt, and Dale are back together after the shenanigans of the last film but have set out to become their own bosses with an invention that is so convoluted that it must be a best-seller in airline malls and TV infomercials. Their ‘Shower Buddy’ quickly catches the attention of Bert and Rex Hansen, proprietors of a mega mail-order catalog who set them up for a large order with the backing of a generous bank to fund their enterprise. Unsurprisingly, Bert (the wonderfully sociopathic Christoph Waltz) pulls the order at the last minute, leaving our trio pissed off and scrambling to save their fledgling business. Yes, Bert and Rex are the titular horrible bosses this time arou

Avengers: Age of Ultron : Opening May 1 The Good : Have you seen The Avenger s ? Considering that it made about $1 and a half billion worldwide, I’d guess it’s a safe assumption that you have. And don’t you remember? It was awesome. Everyone, myself included, was quite skeptical about how Marvel and director Joss Whedon would pull together five movies worth of backstory and characterizations for our titular heroes in any sort of coherent sense that was not just 150 minutes of explosions. But Whedon managed not only to make a coherent movie of a Norse god, an unfrozen man from the ‘40s, and a playboy but make it fun and immensely enjoyable. Since then, Marvel’s “Phase 2” pictures have been pretty solid, especially last years Captain America: The Winter Soldier . And of course, in my opinion, Marvel has never made a bad movie so the main question would really just be: will Avengers: Age of Ultron be great or be better than its predecessor. Not to mention that all of the advan

My summer movie guide to Furious 7 may have prematurely called an end to the franchise with the death of its lead star Paul Walker. Especially since it is became the fastest film to gross $1 billion worldwide. But for fast of the fast and furious variety, it seems smart to set aside April 14, 2017 on your calender for the next installment, according to de-facto series star Vin Diesel from CinemaCon today. And maybe Kurt Russel will play a bigger part! Aside from the release date and some vague details, nothing else is known but considering the amount of money still being delivered from this seven film series, Universal Picture would surely be stupid to stop milking that cow while the audience is still sucking its teat. Paul Walker may have been an integral part of the franchise, his death (and apparently very touching tribute at the end of the last film) will not end the Furiousness. In fact, maybe it will just increase it.

Two completely different movies just bide our time until The Avengers comes out. The Age of Adeline In my travels, I’ve never really been impressed by Blake Lively’s performances. This doesn’t look too much better as Adeline is in a freak car accident that renders her forever young (that was a movie!). She runs away from relationships because they all die and she doesn’t until she meets her one true love and ... well, we can surmise the rest. This feels like a romance book inspired by Benjamin Button with a smidge of every other rom-com thrown in. Verdict: Let it die. Little Boy The titular “little boy” is enamored with his father and all the wonderful bonding they have together. But, oh no! War strikes and daddy is called away, leaving “little boy” to be mopey until he figures out he can move mountains or something. Kevin James is also in this sporting a creeper mustache. Verdict: Schmaltzy, touching, and worthless **NOTE: Either of these would be better choices

The Tanners are returning to your television after a twenty year hiatus. Or should I say ... the Fullers are returning? Because you see, the apparently real show is apparently really titled Fuller House! Because DJ’s last name happens to be Fuller! Oh boy, this sounds ridiculous already! John Stamos dropped the news on Jimmy Kimmel last night that the rumored Full House reunion was on with a 13 episode order from Netflix. This time around, DJ (Kirk Cameron’s less insane sibling Candace Cameron Bure ) is newly widowed, pregnant, and with two rambunctious boys who enlists the help of her younger sister Stephanie ( Jodie Sweetin ) and enternally annoying best friend Kimmy Gibler ( Andrea Barber ) to help out. Series creator Jeff Franklin is back on board with Stamos to produce and likely guest star with negotiations with the rest of the series originals said to be ongoing. No doubt this will delight folks of my general age who religiously watched this show before the Olsen twin

Well, on TV possibly. Deadline is reporting that Paramount Television (apparently undeterred by the failure to transfer Axel Foley to the small screen) is developing a TV series based on everyone’s second favorite Star Trek movie, Galaxy Quest . No other details are readily available but I’m fairly confident in thinking Sir Alan Rickman will not be stooping to broadcast TV to reprise his role of Dr. Lazarus. Best case scenario for this would be a limited production run (on Netflix, because Daredevil is awesome and GO WATCH IT!) that would allow the hilarious space hijinks to continue without a huge time commitment from all of the actors who made the movie what it was. By Grabthar’s Hammer ... let’s do this shit!

This movie demonstrates that family get-togethers can in fact get worse. You’re Next is reminiscent of a lot of other recent films like The Purge or The Strangers with a group of people (a rather large one this time around) trapped in their home, being picked off by villainous folks outside. For their 35th wedding anniversary, Paul and Aubrey invite their four adult kids and their respective significant others to their country house to celebrate. They should have known that was the beginning of their downfall. The film does an excellent job of establishing the characters in the scant minutes available before the carnage begins with some friendly banter between brothers, a nice exchange with the patriarch, and the interrogation of the siblings’ significant others. But all hell breaks loose when cross-bow arrows come flying into the family dinning room as they continue arguing over .... whatever siblings are wont to argue about. This quickly turns the mood from frustratingly hila